So, I have recently been emailing this nice young man on Match and yesterday he asked for my screen name. A year ago I would not have hesitated when it came to IMing an online guy. It is kind of like talking on the phone, right? Well after a year of online dating I'm not entirely sure this is true anymore.
Let's first talk about the positive aspects of IM. It is a great fast way to get to know each other. It is a good tool for people who are a little scared of phones when they first meet. In general IM is a great tool for online dating. It is a nice second step.
Or is it? I have in the past had amazing online relationships with guys. They have lasted a couple months and have been great. Without meeting we feel like we have connected and even talk about things that I would not talk about until like the 7th or 8th date. Is this ok? Online has changed lots of things about how we interact, but you don't honestly know a person until you have met them. You don't know if you actually have chemistry until you have that first meeting.
So IM is a positive thing. I think it is great for getting to know someone. You just have to be careful that you don't invest to much time in the online part without going on an actual date. Dates are important. Dates are the whole reason you do this online, bar, speed dating setup things.