Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Sometimes I Wonder

I recently just rejoined a couple dating sites. I'm not sure why. I don't really like dating sites. I feel like they are so personal and yet utterly impersonal. I have never had any luck and am still (yes, still) hung up on a guy I dated from one of them for a couple months a year ago. I don't know why I keep putting myself out there. It just sucks. I'm so tired of trying and trying and getting rejected and told I'm just not good enough. I got enough of this when I was younger. I wish that I could get a more honest answer. At least when I was younger I had constructive criticism instead of "I'm just not ready for this" and weeks later seeing said guy with a new girlfriend. I have thick skin tell me the truth.

Well, said guy is now back on Match and I think we can take one guess at what he is looking for on there. I am just so sick of this liking him and feeling like well we are suppose to be together. Ugh, I so do not mean that but still there is something I don't really know how to describe. I'm sorry this makes no sense and I hate that I sound like a cheesy girl. I hate that this makes no sense what so ever and it makes me look like some crazy desperate girl. I hate that I keep making a fool out of myself because of him. I've liked guys before that I have known for a lot longer, but well it doesn't really matter now does it.

Anyways, I'm sorry I wrote this post, but it has been on my mind. Thanks for listening.

P.S I know move on to bigger and better things. I know that is logical and what I am suppose to be doing, but well for some reason I just can't.

4 comments:

  1. Don't apologize- it's your blog after all. If you can't write it here, where can you? Love you.

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  2. There is a how I met your mother episode where Ted goes out with a girl and everyone loves her and then he decides he needs to break up with her. And when asked why, his answer is simply "she's not the one" - but in trying to explain that to her he reverts back to old cliche's "I am not ready for a commitment" and "I'm just realllly busy right now"...

    I totally empathisise with being hung up on a guy for a long long long time - asking why and being totally annoyed with how things ended. And this is your space to write that!

    You pretty much said it best yourself though - if this guy is making you feel like a fool, do you really want to be with him anyway? The last paragraph shows that you know you don't *really* want him...and you need to take as long as you need to figure out why you can't move on now. And that's totally cool.

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  3. http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=1699

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  4. I love my blogging friends. Erik that was an excellent cartoon.

    Claire I'm not really sorry I wrote the post because you all had to read it. I'm sorry I wrote the post because I'm kind of annoyed with myself. I think I was apologizing to myself.

    D- I remember that HIMYM and pretty much everyone. If you can't tell I'm a bit of a Ted. I'm ok with that but sometimes I wonder if it makes me kind of lame.

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