Recently I wrote about all the great things that are happening and as everyone knows often that means life is going to test your current state of mind. Test it it did last night. I was having a wonderful evening with my friends when who should walk into the frozen yogurt place I was at the guy who is not so wonderful or amazing. This time I didn't do anything crazy. I did turn a ghostly shade of white. I just was sitting there thinking, "Really world I have lived in the same cities as him (basically parallel lives) for 8 years and never once meet/ran into him and in the course of one month I see him twice?" I realized that after the last horrible incident I never wanted to see him again. I actually wrote in my journal last night why can't he vanish or move far far away.
So I was the bigger person. I am pretty sure he ignored me, but well I just like to make my humiliation more tangible and I went and said hi. I freaked out after I left for like 5 minutes. I woke up this morning fine though. Life is great. Who cares about this guy who is an idiot and doesn't realize how amazing I am? Plus he has way too many girlfriends and not enough guy friends. I think guys like that unless you are gay are strange. I don't know why maybe it is a strange prejudice I have.
The thing is I don't know why he has this affect over me. I have liked guys more then this. I have been best friends with the guys I am crushing on. I'm not even crushing on him. I have this strange thought that we are going to have a When Harry Meet Sallyish type story, but I am by no means holding my breath for that. Life will throw at me what it will. I'm just going to go for a really long run till it disappears.
There are some people who just do that to you. It could be 10 year later or 50 years later (if you are fortunate to live that long and still recognize the person). But there are people where you see them and it just takes you back to being in high school and you feel like you got the wind knocked out of you.
ReplyDeleteMaybe these people are emotional time machines of sorts.
Those experiences used to really knock me off kilter.
I think you are super cool for breaking the ice and just being friendly.
And to think it all happened in a yogurt shop. I love that.
Ah, the humble yoghurt shop. Good on you for being the bigger person :)
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