I recently mentioned that I took a trip home for my vacation. This trip ended up being exactly what I needed to get out of one of my funks. As I mentioned in my last post I was becoming exhausted with life in general. I was dating guys (one of which was great. Well, maybe two), but they all seemed to not be ready to be in a relationship and I just felt like something was wrong with me. This trip made me realize that nothing is wrong with me. I was just hyper focused on how I was not with anyone. I realized that I don't actually want to be with anyone. That if something happens that is great, but I really have to focus on all the other stuff I have going on.
I was reading on the Singlutionary about match.com. I have to agree with the idea that it was forced dating. I was meeting guys that I would want to be friends with, but for some reason I could never become friends with them. I don't know if making out crosses some line, but we never really did more then that. I was getting frustrated by this form of dating. Every time I got told it wouldn't workout I thought what the heck is wrong with me.
So, I have decided that I am going to just be happy. It is amazing how much just being happy can change everything. Today I got a million compliments on how amazing I looked and I felt great. I guess what they say about taking control of your own happiness is true. You have an option to either be happy with your life or not. When you choose to be happy and choose to look at the bright side it is amazing how many good things actually do happen.
Totally! Have you seen Say Anything? John Cusack's character says to his sister "how hard is it to decide to be happy and then just to be happy?" It's just that I love Lloyd Dobler.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I am so happy that you're happy!
Ahhh. I also love Lloyd Dobler! Megs! I am so happy for you! This is so exciting. I had a similar revelation to yours about 5 months ago now. I still have moments where I feel lonely or I feel stuck or frustrated but now I understand that a) if I weren't feeling that way I wouldn't be striving and thriving and b) I would feel the same way if I WERE in a relationship!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you could relate to my match.com stories. Match.com totally exhausts me (but I'm glad I did it because if I didn't I would still be thinking: well, maybe I just need to try harder).
Deidre: Yes to Say Anything... It is so true too.
ReplyDeleteSinglutionary: I know exactly what you mean with Match.com. I've been on Match a couple times, but never paid. I decided that I had to give it a real go. It was exhausting and totally affirmed to me that it just was not the right place for me. I'm not looking that hard and I felt that Match either forced you into hooking up on date 3 or to become serious like right away.